Parenting is so many things to so many people — everyone’s experience is unique. Or, that’s what we’d like to think. When we look to Twitter, though, we find that parents have certain, hilarious universal experiences.
We’ve pulled together some of the best fill-in-the-blank responses to “Parenting is…” from around the Twittersphere. It’s difficult to sum up parenting in one sentence, but these tweeting parents do a pretty amazing job. Here are just a few to give you an idea…
Parenting is basically just listening to yourself talk because nobody else is.
— Court (@Discourt) January 5, 2015
Parenting is 80% making empty threats & 20% picking up miniature toys on the floor.
— Carbosly (@Carbosly) August 19, 2014
90% of parenting is waiting for the other parent to do something about it.
— Ashley Davis (@driveoceanic) April 14, 2015
Has anyone ever noticed that parenting is more like an exercise in crisis management?
— Jill Shalvis (@JillShalvis) April 22, 2015
90% of modern parenting is keeping your kids away from your smartphone.
— No Idea: Daddy Blog (@byclintedwards) March 18, 2015
Parenting is juggling chainsaws and wondering why it's so loud and why your shoulders are so sore.
— Charlie N Andy (@HowToBeADad) April 22, 2015
90% of parenting is just walking around yelling "WHERE ARE YOUR SHOES? WE'RE ALREADY LATE! FIND YOUR SHOES!"
— Lurk @ Home Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) November 22, 2014
Parenting is a conglomeration of everything I've never learned.
— John Willey (@DaddysinCharge) August 28, 2014
88% of parenting is saying "it's bedtime" 150 times between 8:00 and 9:00 every night.
— Sardonic Tart (@SardonicTart) April 23, 2015
Parenting is a lot like a Tarantino film. Lot of questions and violent screaming.
— charliecapen (@charliecapen) June 10, 2014
80% of parenting is yelling through a closed bathroom door.
— Hot Breakfast (@amydillon) January 20, 2015
Parenthood is a journey except it's just traveling from room to room putting away the same toys all day long.
— OneFunnyMummy (@OneFunnyMummy) April 13, 2015
I am saddened by the fact that I am no longer alarmed when my fingers smell like someone else's poo. This, my friends, is parenting.
— Allana Harkin (@AllanaHarkin) March 15, 2014
Parenting is telling your kid they can't eat the red Skittle that fell on the floor because it's dirty then eating it when they're asleep.
— Shawn Hatosy (@ShawnHatosy) April 21, 2015
Parenting is just a drinking game where you drink wine every time your kid is awful.
— That's Parenting (@ThatsParenting) April 21, 2015
90% of parenting is peeling clementines and lying about what time it is.
— Bunmi Laditan (@BunmiLaditan) February 4, 2015
Parenting is 50% love, 10% lies, 10% yelling and 30% unclogging toilets.
— Wonder Woman (@TheSweetestD_) April 11, 2015
My favorite part of parenting is after I drop my kids off at school. I'm kidding. It's after they go to bed.
— Draper (@CallMeDraper) August 7, 2014
Parenting is so easy. …said no parent ever.
— Scott Warner (@ScottWarner18) April 8, 2015